Whattup Greenblasters! 🚀

Today I’m going to do something very courageous:

I’m going to give my 4-day-old take on a slightly controversial piece of entertainment news.

Namely, Jo Koy’s “disastrous” monologue at the Golden Globes the other night:

If you haven’t seen it, feel free to go and watch it now for context. But come back after! If you have seen it, keep reading.

This is not my normal style. I usually stay away from celebrity gossip as a source for exploring themes of public speaking and storytelling.

It always seemed shallow to me, even though there are amazing content creators like Nerdwriter, Charisma on Command and my buddy Max Breaumont who do it well.

Also, there are actual disasters happening. Gaza, Ecuador, Ukraine…

Who gives a fuck about a bunch of jokes told by and to millionaire actors?

I have a couple things in mind here:

1) This event is extremely relevant to the topic of public speaking, which is what I do, and the reactions on YouTube are fascinating (more on this below)

2) I’m trying to grow my audience this year. Celebrity gossip and current events drive traffic and I want to see if I can get over my aversion to this sort of thing - and find my own honest way to do it - to utilize this fact.

So with that in mind, here are the 3 things we can learn about public speaking from Jo Koy’s “catasrophe” (really?) at the 81st Golden Globes:

Thing 1: As the speaker, you’re 100% responsible for the energy in the room

First, let’s recap what actually happened:

Koy walks out, introduces himself (to virtually no applause), talks about how cool it is that there are so many celebrities, names drops a few, normal stuff.

He eventually brings up “Barbenheimer,” and the first joke that bombs is:

“Oppenheimer and Barbie are competing for cinematic box office achievement. Oppenheimer is based on a 724-page Pulitzer Prize-winning book about the Manhattan Project, and Barbie is based on a plastic doll with big boobies.”

Quick note:

I’m not here to talk about whether the jokes themselves are funny or offensive, as those are both subjective, and we have enough click-bait journalism.

I’m interested in the way it went as an onstage performance, and how it could’ve gone better.

So back to the lesson:

He immediately denied responsibility for this joke’s response:

“Some (jokes) I wrote, some other people wrote. Yo, I got the gig ten days ago! You want a perfect monologue? Shut up! You’re kidding me, right? I wrote some of these, and they’re the ones you’re laughing at.”

He threw his writers under the bus for the bad material, took credit for what was working, and blamed the audience for their high expectations.

This is a recipe to lose a crowd, not to mention the viewers at home.

Later he also berated the crowd for not applauding loud enough for Succession’s nine nominations, even though he fumbled his words during the announcement which I think was why there was muted applause.

And he also said after a couple jokes that didn’t land": “That was hilarious to me!” Comedians sometimes get laughs doing this, but usually if they already have the crowd on their side, which Koy definitely did not.

He actually had a bunch fairly successful jokes, he still seemed shaken up by the earlier groans. So his demeanour changed from arrogant to:

Thing 2: “Ask for the tea”

Take a look at this body language 👇 :

This image sums up a lot of his energy as he tried to get the audience back on his side.

He started sinking down - like a peasant before a king in an old movie - at the end of his jokes, smiling way too wide at the crowd, almost begging for laughs.

This brings up the classic theatrical rule of comedy, which comes from a story about a famous duo which is widely shared among actors:

From blogger Ken Levine:

Alfred Lunt and Lynn Fontanne… were trying out a show in Boston. Lunt got a big laugh on a line where he asked for a cup of tea. But during the New York run the laughs on that line dissipated until finally there was nothing but crickets. Lunt was perplexed.  Why was the line no longer working?  Fontanne had the answer. “Ask for a cup of tea, not a laugh.”

Jo Koy made a fundamental mistake, which I myself make all the time:

You don't have to prove that you belong on stage while you're on stage.

In fact, that’s probably the best way to prove you don’t.

The more you try to convince the audience that you belong up there, the harder you push, begging them to like you - asking for a laugh instead of a cup of tea - the less likely it is to happen.

Many of the best things in life follow this so-called “Backwards Law,” stating that

You get what you want by letting go of wanting it, and public speaking is one of them.

So how can you let go of wanting something as important as the biggest onstage performance of your life?

What can we learn from the aftermath of Koy’s performance?

Thing 3: The worst that can happen isn’t that bad

Let’s look at the top comment under the video on YouTube:

First of all, hilarious (if you’re not Jo Koy).

Second, it speaks to a deep and common nightmare among so many people:

“umiliating” yourself onstage and in front of millions of viewers at home.

Here’s how Jo himself felt:

“Deflated.” He also said it “hurt.”

But later on, he said: “I had fun.” and “It’s a night I’ll always remember.”

This is the most important lesson to learn, so I’ll repeat:

The worst that can happen isn’t that bad.

“Jo Koy monologue” went viral after it happened. People tweeted, they called it “disastrous,” a “catastrophe.” This is many people’s worst nightmare.

But guess what: he's fine.

He’s safe, he has money, he’ll still get work. Think of the other actual catastrophes going on in the world. Comparatively, he’s great.

That’s the fundamental truth I want you to absorb deep in your nervous system:

The worst that can happen onstage isn't that bad.

You might:

• bomb a pitch to a big investor

• freeze during a presentation to a huge client

• or forget your words during your first TEDx talk

If that ever happens to you - which it probably won’t - you’ll be fine.

Our onstage performances almost always go better than we think, and even if people call it a disaster, there are real disasters out there.

If you’re lucky enough to live in a safe place, before your next talk, repeat these words to yourself:

“Whatever happens, I’m safe. I will be OK. The people who love me before, will love me after.

All will be well.”

❤️

That’s it for this week! I hope you liked this newsletter, PLEASE forward it to a friend if you did, or reply NICE to help with deliverability.

See y’all next week (sorry for the y’all I was in Nashville over the holidays) 🚀